BISMILLAHIRRAHMANIRRAHIM
ASSALAMUALAIKUM WBT
Sebelum sebakul spekulasi sampai ke pendengaran, aku bagitahu awal-awal entry yang bakal aku tulis ni ialah atas permintaan Peahlofa. Sebab baru-baru ni beliau mengalami satu pengambaran drama epik yang memang tak dapat kat mana-mana atau siapa-siapa. And of course, this is all about relationship. Sebab yelah, umur-umur macam ni, krisis misis fefeeling camni standard lah kan. Lepas tu pulak masing-masing spesis cepat je nak meroyan, hah, memang kenalah update gamaknya.
Hari tu dalam facebook aku dah point out dua benda yang aku rasa paling penting dalam relationship. Communication and trust. Status kemain panjang lebaq dah macam e-book gamaknya. Kisah pulak aku kan. Tapi kali ni, Peah request untuk highlightkan satu benda lagi which is commitment. So, basically commit, communicate and trust, cuba cari dalam search engine, confirm akan jumpa tiga point ni. Or one of it at least. Confirm. Dan antara sebab kenapa sesuatu hubungan tak berjalan dengan cantik pun, sure disebabkan salah satu daripada tiga benda ni missing. Or maybe ketiga-tiganya (kalaulah aku gigih search assignment macam ni).
Ok, let me be honest. Aku memang tak berapa nak faham apa yang terjadi between Peah and her boyfriend but base on my general view, I believe that they have these three elements in their relationship. Kalau tak, takkan lepas dah berdrama pun relationship still go on kan. They commit to each other, they keep communicate (gaduh pun communicate jugak ok) and they trust each other. Serius, aku sangat kagum sebab ok, actually aku rasa masing-masing tak bersalah pun. Krisisnya is just ada 3rd party yang sengaja nak usik-usik relationship diorang ni. Saje nak bergurau la tu. Kasaq gurauan tuan hamba. Hamba yang tak ada kena mengena ni pun rasa macam nak bagi makan kaki kat tuan hamba hokey. Lepas ni jangan buat macam tu lagi tuan hamba, biadab namanya. Mak marah nanti.
So alhamdulillah. Relationship mereka sudah kembali lancar. Biasalah tu asam garam rumah tangga. And nampakkan contoh dah terang-terang depan mata. Betapa pentingnya untuk percaya pada pasangan, commit and communicate dengan mereka. Tu baru satu. Nak contoh lagi, ok I'll give another one. Remember Mr. Feelingless? After 17 days meroyan, ingatkan nak give up. Rupanya tidak. Aku takkan cerita panjang pasal dia. Cuma nak bagitahu kenapa the relationship can not work is because we can't communicate well. I mean, he was so busy with works and some other problems eh eh tak boleh la nak terima alasan sibuk sampai tak boleh nak contact orang. Sangat tak boleh terima.
And trust issue as well. Simply say, I can trust him but still I feel insecure. Sebab tak tahulah. Lack of communication kot. See, dia patah balik issue communication tadi. Yelah, kalau tak communicate macam mana nak update dengan life masing-masing? Macam mana nak feel secure kalau dah start paranoid? Mulalah nak fikir yang bukan-bukan. Mulalah nak meroyan. Dahlah. Penat nak ulang. Communication tu penting ok communication tu P.E.N.T.I.N.G. Tak kira la bergaduh ke, berkasih-sayang ke, bergurau ke anything yang penting kena ada communication.
Lepas tu the problem with commitment. Yang cerita aku tadi actually bukanlah aku nak paksa dia settle-down pun. Tapi kalau belum apa-apa lagi dia dah mengaku memang tak nak commit into relationship, so fahamlah. Alasan yang ni lagi best. Kita-tak-tahu-apa-akan-jadi-in-future-so-why-should-we-commit? Oh, maksud you, kalau apa-apa jadi in this relationship you nak cakap something like benda-dah-nak-jadi or maybe we-should-just-let-it-go macam tu? Sebab kita tak ada commitment so you rasa both side tak perlu make effort untuk protect the relationship laaa? And so kalau you tak commit then once you jumpa orang lain senang la you nak cakap, we're-not-even-in-relationship macam tu ke? Haaa, nampak tak siapa tengah meroyan sekarang?
Emosi sangat mengenangkan perangai orang yang tak peka dengan perasaan orang lain. Tak nak commit? Ingat ni casual-dating? (For those yang tak tahu casual dating tu apa sila tanya Encik Gugel ok). But basically it's something to do with no-commitment-relationship. Yang bagi aku hanya orang-orang penakut je dating-macam-ni. And bagi aku jugak casual-dating ni samalah macam mempermainkan perasaan orang. Bunyi macam best kan sebab ada word 'dating' tu but the fact is you're still looking for another options sampailah kau jumpa someone yang lebih baik. Oh, kalau macam tu tak payah bercinta, tak payah commit, tak payah kahwin laaa. Boleh tukar pasangan hari-hari.
Ok, aku rasa aku patut stop kat sini. Nanti orang mulalah nak argue 'kita-nak-cari-pasangan-hidup-yang-terbaik' laaa 'kahwin-bukan-untuk-sehari-dua' laaa I mean, mesti ada yang nak agree dengan casual dating tu kan. Tapi I tak kisahlah. That's your point of view. I was telling mine. So, terpulanglah. Call me old school, call me kolot or whatever, but as for me, relationship and feeling is not something for us to play with. Do believe in karma, qada' dan qadar. Allah is always the Greatest.
p/s: sorry Iema, aku tak edit assignment Prof Chan lagi. promise lepas ni aku buat...heee
Ok, let me be honest. Aku memang tak berapa nak faham apa yang terjadi between Peah and her boyfriend but base on my general view, I believe that they have these three elements in their relationship. Kalau tak, takkan lepas dah berdrama pun relationship still go on kan. They commit to each other, they keep communicate (gaduh pun communicate jugak ok) and they trust each other. Serius, aku sangat kagum sebab ok, actually aku rasa masing-masing tak bersalah pun. Krisisnya is just ada 3rd party yang sengaja nak usik-usik relationship diorang ni. Saje nak bergurau la tu. Kasaq gurauan tuan hamba. Hamba yang tak ada kena mengena ni pun rasa macam nak bagi makan kaki kat tuan hamba hokey. Lepas ni jangan buat macam tu lagi tuan hamba, biadab namanya. Mak marah nanti.
So alhamdulillah. Relationship mereka sudah kembali lancar. Biasalah tu asam garam rumah tangga. And nampakkan contoh dah terang-terang depan mata. Betapa pentingnya untuk percaya pada pasangan, commit and communicate dengan mereka. Tu baru satu. Nak contoh lagi, ok I'll give another one. Remember Mr. Feelingless? After 17 days meroyan, ingatkan nak give up. Rupanya tidak. Aku takkan cerita panjang pasal dia. Cuma nak bagitahu kenapa the relationship can not work is because we can't communicate well. I mean, he was so busy with works and some other problems eh eh tak boleh la nak terima alasan sibuk sampai tak boleh nak contact orang. Sangat tak boleh terima.
And trust issue as well. Simply say, I can trust him but still I feel insecure. Sebab tak tahulah. Lack of communication kot. See, dia patah balik issue communication tadi. Yelah, kalau tak communicate macam mana nak update dengan life masing-masing? Macam mana nak feel secure kalau dah start paranoid? Mulalah nak fikir yang bukan-bukan. Mulalah nak meroyan. Dahlah. Penat nak ulang. Communication tu penting ok communication tu P.E.N.T.I.N.G. Tak kira la bergaduh ke, berkasih-sayang ke, bergurau ke anything yang penting kena ada communication.
Lepas tu the problem with commitment. Yang cerita aku tadi actually bukanlah aku nak paksa dia settle-down pun. Tapi kalau belum apa-apa lagi dia dah mengaku memang tak nak commit into relationship, so fahamlah. Alasan yang ni lagi best. Kita-tak-tahu-apa-akan-jadi-in-future-so-why-should-we-commit? Oh, maksud you, kalau apa-apa jadi in this relationship you nak cakap something like benda-dah-nak-jadi or maybe we-should-just-let-it-go macam tu? Sebab kita tak ada commitment so you rasa both side tak perlu make effort untuk protect the relationship laaa? And so kalau you tak commit then once you jumpa orang lain senang la you nak cakap, we're-not-even-in-relationship macam tu ke? Haaa, nampak tak siapa tengah meroyan sekarang?
Emosi sangat mengenangkan perangai orang yang tak peka dengan perasaan orang lain. Tak nak commit? Ingat ni casual-dating? (For those yang tak tahu casual dating tu apa sila tanya Encik Gugel ok). But basically it's something to do with no-commitment-relationship. Yang bagi aku hanya orang-orang penakut je dating-macam-ni. And bagi aku jugak casual-dating ni samalah macam mempermainkan perasaan orang. Bunyi macam best kan sebab ada word 'dating' tu but the fact is you're still looking for another options sampailah kau jumpa someone yang lebih baik. Oh, kalau macam tu tak payah bercinta, tak payah commit, tak payah kahwin laaa. Boleh tukar pasangan hari-hari.
Ok, aku rasa aku patut stop kat sini. Nanti orang mulalah nak argue 'kita-nak-cari-pasangan-hidup-yang-terbaik' laaa 'kahwin-bukan-untuk-sehari-dua' laaa I mean, mesti ada yang nak agree dengan casual dating tu kan. Tapi I tak kisahlah. That's your point of view. I was telling mine. So, terpulanglah. Call me old school, call me kolot or whatever, but as for me, relationship and feeling is not something for us to play with. Do believe in karma, qada' dan qadar. Allah is always the Greatest.
Tibe-tibe rasa nak tengok The Notebook.
Sekian, eh apasal muka serius sangat? Rilek beb. Waaa memang macam ni.
p/s: sorry Iema, aku tak edit assignment Prof Chan lagi. promise lepas ni aku buat...heee
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